Watersports

http://newyork.craigslist.org/mnh/cas/419329993.html

The author of this ad considers "takin' a piss on a girl" to be a watersport, like polo or swimming. I guess it's appropriate that the champion in that sport get a golden medal.

Seriously, what woman doesn't want to be referred to as "toilet girl"? Who knows how many love songs have been written about the toilet girl, who looked as good as she smelled.

This toilet girl is also into virtual play. Because if there's anything weirder than pissing on a stranger, it's cyberpissing on a stranger.

CWBYWLL: Ohhh, my warm piss is arching upwards into the air
TOYLETGURL4: Oh, I feel it on me. It feels so warm
CWBYWLL: Oh yeah, it's splashing back on me.
CWBYWLL: Oh, no, I'm almost done!
TOYLETGURL4: Oh baby, I'm so wet.

This girl wants to hear the nastiest fantasies of strangers on the internet. I think she's handling the nasty fantasy situation just fine on her own. Personally, I can't be with a slutty girl like this. At best, I'd put one of those plastic toilet seat covers on her face first. Who knows who else has been there?

toilet girl - w4m - 24

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Reply to: pers-419329993@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-09-10, 11:54PM EDT


Any guyz into watersports...takin' a piss on a girl? Would love to hear your stories and what turns you on. 24 y/o female looking to be used or maybe some virtual play. Hardcore and dominant males only, who really get off on this type of thing. Would love to hear your nastiest fantasy.

Dialogue

http://newyork.craigslist.org/brk/cas/418368311.html, http://newyork.craigslist.org/brk/cas/418397202.html, http://newyork.craigslist.org/brk/cas/418387304.html and http://newyork.craigslist.org/brk/cas/418407784.html.

As there is in any public forum, there is debate on CAS. In the first post, a heavy tattooed woman posted an ad with naked pictures, asking for sex. She also posted a fairly lengthy list of requirements.

A reader responded with an angry post, criticizing the original author for stringent requirements despite fairly homely looks.

Another reader responded by saying that the original author is good looking in her own way and that it is unnecessarily mean for a person to criticize someone for being honest with who they are and what they want.

Finally a fourth reader greeted the debaters with the word "hay." He then began his contribution to the discussion as if he were writing a for...next statement. His drunken ramblings began "For I'm a big guy chubby." For what? For six words later, he retracts his statement and then adjusts it, "okay fat." He immediately defends himself "but with 11 inches ."
Already the reader is wondering, "What the hell?" And the author himself adds "what the hell."

But then the reader says what I'm sure many drunk and lonely guys were thinking: "I would hit that she look good to me she's not ugly."

Then he gets all racial: "Stop it then when the white chicks look for us black dude to service them you start that old bullshit stop it" I dont think the original ad mentioned black dudes. In fact, she limited her search to whites and Hispanics only. But somehow that old bullshit got started. And I join in this man of the people in saying it should stop. Hay now.

Looking for some fun tonight - w4m - 32

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Reply to: pers-418368311@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-09-09, 11:08PM EDT


I am a 32 year old woman in Brooklyn looking for a younger man between 21 and 28 years or to have some fun tonight. I am really horny and need someone that can last a few hours. You must be in excellent shape, good looking, well endowed with a lot of energy. I prefer clean shaven guys with either white or light skinned hispanic. Please respond with a picture if interested and fit the requirements.

Re: Looking for some fun tonight - w4m - 32 - w4m - 32

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Reply to: pers-418387304@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-09-09, 11:38PM EDT


1. LOL

2. So you're looking for someone in EXCELLENT SHAPE.... while you're at least 50-70 lbs over weight?

3. LOL!

4. You're looking for someone good looking.... while you look like that???????

5. LOL!!!

6. You want someone well endowed... why would someone good looking, in excellent shape, and well endowed want to waste their energy on a fat, ugly, monster?

7. LOLLOLOLOLOLOL!!!!

8. Fit the requirements????? .... you should try fitting into your own league sweety. You're really really reaching with your post.

9. LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

10. Get Real

Re: Looking for fun tonight - 32 - w4m

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Reply to: pers-418397202@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-09-09, 11:55PM EDT


Wow, you're an insensitive dick dude. I think she looks fine and I happen to like that body type and she has the right to look for whatever she wants. If you're so fucking hot and great, then why are you at home putting up lame ass mean shit on CL instead of going out and being the best stud you can be? As for me, I'm just chilling tonight, however for you...

Answer: Maybe it's cause you're an asshole.

Re:Re: Looking for fun tonight - 32 - w4m - m4w - 38

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Reply to: pers-418407784@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-09-10, 12:14AM EDT


hay,
For I'm a big guy chubby okay fat but with 11 inches what the hell I would hit that she look good to me she's not ugly. Stop it then when the white chicks look for us black dude to service them you start that old bullshit stop it

IThink Ur Weird?Xtra Weird

http://newyork.craigslist.org/mnh/cas/414131252.html

The author of this ad likes abbreviating. She replaces "Extra" with "Xtra" and "You" with "U". She even just takes out spaces when she feels they're not necessary. I wish this was the weirdest part of the ad. It's not.

This woman is not only turned on by a large, hairy ass, but is turned on by people who try desperately to lose weight and are frustrated and unable to do so. A soup of your fat, hair and sad failure is her aphrodisiac. In the only full and complete sentence in her ad, she asks you if you feel like you are the victim of a supernatural curse causing your ass to stay fat. Only if you are so angry and distraught that you've considered that demons are ruining your ass will this woman be into you.

Also she likes butt sniffing.

She describes herself as normal. And the fact is, she may as well be. Predicting what women want is a difficult if not impossible process. I'm sure this woman is totally normal-seeming in real life and there are dozens of nice dudes trying to win her affections. And they're failing and beating themselves up for it. And little do they know that they don't have a chance because predicting what any given woman wants is like predicting the stock market. There are general trends, but if anyone was even remotely reliably accurate at it, they'd be a billionaire.

UHave Tree Trunk Thighs?Xtra Junk In Ur Trunk? Hairy Lower Body? - w4m - 29

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Reply to: pers-414131252@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-09-04, 10:24PM EDT


Do you feel like you have a curse? You can not lose weight in your ass and thighs no matter what you do? I think it's hot. A guy who is fit up top with huge thighs and a chunky hairy butt, size 34", 36", 38" waist. Into butt sniffing and worship. Safe, serious. My fetish is weird but I am good looking, normal.

I lots of things

http://newyork.craigslist.org/lgi/cas/412867406.html

The author of this ad writes like I speak when I'm really really drunk. And if the author is drunk, that's impressive for 2:25pm.

Then again, it is Labor Day. Maybe she was at a picnic, had some beers in the yard, and then came inside to go find sex on the internet. If that's not the purpose of a federal holiday, then what is?

The author starts listing generic adjectives that apply to her (and a verb?), including "and many more." As if maybe we thought she gave us an exhaustive list and would be stunned to discover that those six words didn't sum her up entirely as a person.

She then lists such unique interests as "sports", "sex", and "going out to dinner". She's one in a million, I tell you.

But maybe that the essence of Labor Day. It's a day of the masses. A day when the faceless millions from the Long Islands of the country get to stop being cogs in an industrial machine and get to get drunk in the afternoon and be fabulously ordinary and search for whatever flirtatious and sexual release they can get before it's time to go back to work.

do u got what i'm lookin for - w4m - 21

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Reply to: pers-412867406@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-09-03, 2:25PM EDT


Hey Guys, How everybody doing? I hope you enjoying the weekend. Well I'm brown skin, dark brown eyes, 57, weight 170. I'm funny, outgoing, understand, blunt person, aggressive, and many more. I'm into sports, movies, sex, traveling, going out to dinner, movies, bowling, reading, listen to music, and many others. Well I'm looking for that right guy that I can talk too, hang out with, and do others thing with. A guy who is respectful, no kids, don't smoke, live by his self, knows how to dress, and treat a women. The ages are 22 and up.